On the Recovery Connection Line, warmline callers tell me stories of how they’ve been mistreated. So many stories of the unkind, uncaring and horrific acts of others. Unfortunately, many of us have been victimized by choices of others. It’s real and damaging—and it’s grievous. Grieving these experiences is part of the healing process.

If we are on a recovery path, we come to a place where we understand that regardless of being victimized (if we want to grow and heal) we must choose not to remain “the victim.” Many callers have taken the brave step of letting go of toxic people and situations in their lives and are learning more and more ways to empower themselves. Yet, in the process of healing, they often express not feeling seen, heard, or understood by others in their lives as they recover and progress toward making new healthy choices/connections. Thankfully, our warmline provides these callers with a safe, non-judgmental space in which to be seen, heard, and understood as they are healing.

Part of recovery is understanding that we are only in control of our own feelings/behaviors, (regardless of what another has done/said) and we can’t expect another to do or say something in a particular way to appease us. Long term, recovery is learning to see, hear, understand, and love ourselves as we become our own best friends. When we do feel seen, heard, understood, treated with kindness, respect, or received love from another, we will bask in the gratitude of the absolute gift of it.

Cheri Thomas

Cheri works as a Peer Support Specialist for RI in Arizona. She has experienced loss and grief which has led her to write for the masses to bring voice to those in similar situations. Cheri possesses a deep passion to share with, encourage, and inspire others on what she calls the Journey of the Heart.